2018-01-13 - The Baptism - A Pro-Life Story

Today, as we celebrate, the feast of the Baptism of the Lord, I'd like us to think back to the last time we saw a baptism.  Maybe it was a family member, maybe it was someone we didn't know at Sunday mass.  It's a joyful occasion, the parents are excited, there's a little bouncing baby up front, there's something about a baptism that gets an entire parish excited.  It's a moment when we gather together to profess our faith with Joy, welcoming a new member into our community. Of course we also have the joy of welcoming in adult baptisms.  This year, I'm excited to say that between the places I serve, it looks like we'll have 6 Adult Baptisms.  There too, it's a joy to welcome someone new into our community.  Sometimes though, entering that new community can be scary.  Sometimes it's so easy to convince ourselves that we'll mess it up.  Sometimes we're afraid of what people will think.  Baptism means new life, and a new reality.  It means washing away our sins for a clean start.

So this Sunday I'd like to tell a story about a very special baptism I celebrated, just about 3 years ago now.   If you happen to turn on the TV to channel 8 this morning, to our diocesan TV Show, Proclaim, you'll see me with a young mom and her adorable little 3-year-old boy.   This Friday will be the March for Life, and after the interview was over, she said there were a few things she wanted to tell and didn't get a chance to, so she asked me if I would tell her story.  The more I reflect on her story, the more I really believe it's worth telling because, in many ways, it's an experience I think many of us have lived through, although in different circumstances.

For many, many years, I ran a bus with young people down to the March for Life in Washington, DC.  Back in 2015.  That year, I had, as I usually did, a couple of kids who I was pretty sure weren't all that interested in the cause but decided that going on a trip and missing a day of school sounded like a pretty good idea.  That year, there were 3 specific ones sitting in the very back of the bus, although I didn't realize it at the time, that trip made quite the impression.  About a month or two later, 16-year-old Nikki made a bit of a discovery.  A few drug-store pregnancy tests and a whole bunch of tears later, she knew she was pregnant.  At first, she was terrified, how would this work, what would she do?  She briefly considered getting rid of the child, but then the images she had seen at the march stuck with her and she said to herself, no, it's a baby, I know I have to do this.   I won't belabor that part because she tells it better herself on tv.  After that decision was made, she called the father of the baby to tell him.  She was a bit worried about what he would think, but she was still in shock and had to tell someone.  She was surprised at how well he took the news,  He immediately started talking about how he was about to graduate, he was going to get a second job and help her with the baby. Then, she told her best friend, who promised to keep it a secret.

Next, she knew was her mother, but she was scared.  A hundred ideas were running through her head.  How was she going to break the news?  Would her mom pressure her to get rid of the baby, Would she throw her out of the house?  What would happen?  So she waited that night and said she'd tell her the next day.  Well, the next day came and went, and a few more.  The longer it went, the harder it got.  So she tried to tell one of her favorite teachers.  Nikki walked into her classroom and said, "Can I talk to you about something."  When the teacher told her sure, She almost had the words out, when that fear hit her.  What is she going to think of me?  What's she going to say?  She couldn't do it, she just said.  "oh, I'm having trouble with my grades" and ran off.

For the next 7 months, she hid the baby, terrified of what anyone would think.  Every time she tried to tell someone, she kept thinking of all the bad things that could happen.   Every day that she didn't say a word, it got a little worse.  She was convinced how the whole world would mistreat her.  She was convinced how she'd be a terrible mother.  She was convinced how she would be called all sorts of names by ever other student at the school.  She was convinced how she would be mistreated.

Until October of 2016.  It's uncomfortable for me to tell this part, but I was a high school Chaplain at the time, and at a school mass, I told the story of another girl, a story I told here a while ago,  that happened up near State College.  How her community rallied around her and supported her, how they stuck up for that girl who was in trouble and loved her.  They helped her get her life back together and she was doing great, and that sort of support was what pro-life really looked like.  Unknown to me, Nikki was listening, that was the encouragement she needed.  She let me and the Assistant Principal in on her little secret.  Of course, I immediately put her in touch with the girl from the story I had just told, and I'll never forget what Liz, the first girl told her.  She said.  "I want you to remember one thing, you made one mistake, everything else you've done from that point on has been a good thing."  Then she said, "I'm sure you'll make a great mother."   In the next few weeks, she began to realize that folks weren't nearly as bad as she had been afraid of.  Sure, there were some rude folks, there always are, but most of them really were supportive.  Of course, there were a few funny moments, like when she finally did tell her mother "I think I'm pregnant"  He mother said, well, let's go get you a blood test to be sure" and she lifted her shirt to show a 7-month belly as her mother said.  Oh….never mind. Or when we got up to my office and she wanted to go to confession and said: "Gosh, it's a lot easier when everybody already knows what you did."   But The one thing she most wanted to communicate was how many ideas kept running through her head of how everything that could go wrong would.  The thing she needed most wasn't things, but encouragement.    She needed someone to look at her and simply say "I think you'll be a good mom."  She said one of the most meaningful moments was when a girl from her class, who was known as one of the popular kids, wanted to stop by to see the baby and to let her know that although they hadn't been friends, she wanted to do what she could to be supportive.  Today, it's not easy, but she's doing very well with her little 3-year-old bundle of joy.  I've never seen her happier, than the day I came back to Johnstown, and there, with all her family by her side, we baptized that little baby and she knew…she had the support she needed.

I think for each of us when we find ourselves stuck in sin, especially a sin we want to hide, something we don't want anyone to find out about.  Which, let's face it, is most sins,  It separates us from our community, from everyone we know.  Suddenly we're alone and terrified.  We all ask ourselves those same questions.  If our deepest darkest sin were revealed to the world, how would those around us really react?  What would happen?  What would we do?   It's exactly in that moment that each of us has to remember the unconditional love of Jesus Christ.  The bruised reed, he will not break, the smoldering wick he will not quench.  We have a God who appeared, not because of any righteous deed, but because of his mercy.  But it's precisely through Jesus's love, through the outpouring of his grace, that we are given the strength to grow, the strength to change, the strength to become what he calls us to be.  Just as that scared little girl, has now grown into a wonderful mother, So for us, no matter what our sin, if we really know, beyond any shadow of a doubt, that we can trust in the Love of Jesus Christ, that he loves us, supports us, and wants to help us every step of the way, we too can have the courage she had, to open up about the sin we've been hiding, and through God's grace, we can see, that although we did make one mistake, If we're willing to follow his lead, he can write straight with the crooked lines of our lives, and turn that mistake into something new and beautiful.